


Ben Hanscom

by xxxbuffyxxx



Series: The Death of the Losers Club [2]
Category: IT (2017), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Character Death, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Multi, Pennywise (IT) is His Own Warning, Weirdness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-26
Updated: 2018-05-26
Packaged: 2019-05-14 01:31:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,299
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14760032
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xxxbuffyxxx/pseuds/xxxbuffyxxx
Summary: Another addition to The Death of the Losers Club. Sorry it took so long, exams have been kicking my ass. this one's all about Benny Boy. Sorry about any spelling errors, my computer doesn't autocorrect and i don't have the time or energy go through it and fix it.





	Ben Hanscom

“What… the…flip?” Bev said, looking at Stan with pure rage on her face. Stan looked away from his datemates and to the cliff edge of the quarry. He rolled his sleeve back down. “Are they what I think they are?”  


Richie frowned at Stan, and said, “was it the best idea to start with that?”  


Stan turned to him, eyes slightly wet. “I wouldn’t have been able to say it otherwise”  
Ben, who had been concerningly quiet, walked up to Stan and gently, almost timidly, went to take his arm. With a shaking hand he lifted Stan’s exposed arm and his breath shuddered at the sight of rows and rows of perfectly parallel cuts and scars from his wrist up to his elbow. Stan suddenly looked very interested in the ground under his feet, kicking a small pebble a few feet before it hit his boyfriend’s shoe. He looked back up to see Ben’s eyes leaking tears.  


“No, hey, it’s okay, im okay” he said, and no one mentioned that this was a lie. “Please don’t cry.”  


Ben stared into Stan’s eyes, which were still full of tears that he had not shed. “I need a few minutes. Im going home”  


He dropped Stan’s arm, which had lost all feeling and fell to his side, and he walked to the path to his house, blocking out the voices of the people he loved. Why would Stan ever think to do that to himself? Didn’t he know how much they all loved him? Hadn’t they proved it? They hadn’t been together that long, only starting their relationship shortly after… IT happened.  


They didn’t talk about it. Ever. It was an unspoken rule, never speak about that summer. Never mention the circus. Never talk about IT.  


There were other things too, like how they never talked about Eddie staying over at Bill’s more than necessary. How Beverly now lives with her aunt. How mike shoots without hesitation. How bill and Richie argue less and less, almost as if they are scared as to what might happen. Like how they never talked about Stan staring into the mirror, tears in his eyes…  


Stan.  


Ben hadn’t noticed until he stopped running in the well house. He looked around, realising where he was, and turned, ready to leave. He walked to the door and stood in front of it, waiting for it to close, and for him to be stuck there again.  


Nothing happened, but then, Ben didn’t think he was expecting it to. He sighed and walked through the door, into the garden.  


Except… this wasn’t the garden. He turned around, seeing the exact same door he had just gone through, and through it, sunlight streamed in. Ben’s breath quickened, and he walked through again, but the outside world still remained on the other side of the door.  


Eventually Ben was just spinning, trying to figure out how this was possible. If anyone was outside they must have thought he was insane or having a fit. He was just spinning for about a minute, before falling against the doorframe, dizzy.  


Mid-spin, he saw someone chuckling on the stairs. It looked like... Ben stopped, trying to figure out if there was actually someone there, or if he had just span a few too many times. He screwed his eyes shut, before opening them, seeing no one in front of him. He tried one more time, turning and walking out of the house, before ending up next to the well.  


Wait… what?  


He looked around, from the well next to him to the open door behind him. He walked through it, but still ended up in the same room, looking at the well which had become his worst nightmare. His eyes started tearing up and he quickly wiped them, not willing to let anyone see him cry.  


When he opened his eyes, the walls were moving. He jumped and walked towards one timidly. He saw himself the day he moved into Derry, watching the children playing in the arcade and in the road, as his mother swerved to avoid hitting the younger children. He smiled, remembering the hope that he had that day. He’d been so sure that the first day of school would be better than his old school, there couldn’t be any bullies in a town this small, right?  


Ben had learned very quickly that that was not the case. He watched the second picture as Henry Bowers shoved him into his locker, and herd the voice behind him, saying that he was ‘in for a world of pain’.  


Ben jumped out of his memories, and looked around for the older boy, but seeing no one. He turned back to the moving pictures and just now questioned how they were moving. He almost wanted to stop looking at them, but then he remembered how he couldn’t leave before. Why would he be able to now?  


He looked at the next photo, on the kissing bridge. Henry shoving him into the handrail and slicing his name into his stomach. Ben remembered coming home and the curse of the adults in Derry had got to them, and they just gave him a first aid kit and let him fix it up himself.  


Ben never had to use it due to meeting the others (minus Mike).  


He walked over to the next photo and saw Eddie on the floor, being protected by Richie and Bill. He saw Pennywise for a moment before seeing red, and he clutched his stomach on instinct. He felt something wet and looked down, gasping at seeing red start to coat his chest. He felt nothing, no pain, he didn’t feel anything on his tummy, but his hand felt the warm liquid seeping through his fingers, saw it dripping down to the floor.  


His breath seriously quickened for the first time now, everything else had felt like a dream, as if it wasn’t really happening. This, which wasn’t exactly ‘real’, was the one thing that felt it.  


Ben looked back at the moving pictures on the wall, wanting this torture to be over already so that he could go and tell the others what was happening. That IT was back.  


He saw himself in the sewers, kissing Beverly, but this time it showed it from the outside. He could see how determined he was, remembering how many times it worked in movies. A wave of dizziness jumped on Ben, and he stumbled into the wall, hitting his head on the next picture, and the entire room shook. He put both hands on the wall, pushing himself off of it and stared at the picture in front of his face.  


It seemed to be of now, he was bleeding, leaving puddles of blood at his feet and he was looking at the pictures and then the picture glitched. A moment later he could see himself falling down the well next to him. Ben gasped, and his heart jumped.  


He turned to the next picture, blood running off a slim, slender wrist. Stan.  


He looked at the picture next to it, a needle sticking out of a vein in someone’s arm, mismatched bracelets next to the long piece of metal. Richie.  


He saw the next one, chipped nail varnish on bitten down fingernails holding a burnt-out cigarette. Beverly.  


He turned to the next one. A gun in dark skinned hands, splatters of blood on it. Mike.  


An empty pill bottle next to a passed-out figure. Eddie.  


A sobbing form on a small bed. Bill.  


Ben practically ran to look at the next picture, but he stumbled on something on the floor. A hard object, which made him fall.  


The last thing he felt was the side of the well as he went down.

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry for that.


End file.
